Who will I talk to now?

When I see you so peaceful soon after your fight
When the dark of this year is exposed to the light
When the mere thought of looking weakens my knees
When what to say then, becomes what are to be’s ?
When I think why we’re here and know what it’s for
When the wound from this day is open and sore
When I am up there alone spilling my gut
When I need someone’s help, to get out of this rut ?
When I carry this burden alone as I walk
When my shaky soul quivers as I try to talk
When the pain of this date recurs every year
When this terrible ache is replaced by the fear ?
When people come to me and look for strength
When answers escape me despite every length
When my weary shoulders feel only so strong
When the burden of right is outweighed by wrong ?

Who will I talk to?

When my mind drifts to that place where you were
What relief will I find that acts as my cure
Whenever my depths extend to new lows
Where can I run, to someone who knows ?
Where do I turn when I’ve just lost my way
When remembering delays the start to my day
When I look in the mirror to the reflection I see
When I turn to realize that you’re not here with me ?
When I think about what to buy for a gift
When my confidence wavers and I just need a lift
When I need someone to say just the right words
When I open a window, to “hear from the birds” ?
When my laughter subsides with a memory of you
When it’s out with the old and on to the new
When boxes can’t hide the now from the then
When doors don’t conceal the where from the when ?

Who will I turn to?

When inevitable loss finds me again
When I can’t erase what I write with my pen
When just the right phrase seems to elude
When the wrong expression alters my mood ?
When the root of my pain stings to the core
When the echo of your loss resonates more
When the whole of my heart is empty still
Whenever the way surpasses my will ?
What can I reach for, to lift up my mind
When I can’t leave frustration further behind
When the sound of my fury is the last that I’ve heard
When I cry with each reading, or with every word ?
When I question the reason, despite the rhyme
When the day never ends, despite the time
What do I do when my dreams see your face
When a song reminds me, of a time and a place ?

I will do my own talking…

When I’ve found the path to be my own guide
When the caring shapes my character inside
When my children ask me about who you were
When I answer, my words will be strong and be sure.
When someone I meet sees something in me
When I manage to love and just learn to be
When the feelings fly, from my mind to the page
When captured emotions release from their cage.
When my stories bring smiles more often than tears
When my heart opens up after all of these years
When I see your picture it reminds me to care
When I look at my life, I am sure and aware.
When the poems are complete and ready to share
When the things that I’ve said take me back there
What more can I say than I am happy and fine
When the memories are yours, they’ll always be mine.

G.G. Jan.18/13


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