Nest

I am still not used to it.
Both of them only half the time
was hard enough to accept.
Then the teenage years came
and they became independent.
Half the time became
half the time, half the time.
Then came graduation,
and jobs, and university for one.
And now it’s half of them,
half of half the time.
In less than a year and a half
it will be none of them
almost all the time.
That’s life, I suppose…20171130_094348


NEST
 

Our new family home,
that I bought to share
A shell of a house
without you there
Echoes in the halls
Walls, inside of walls
Some framed with memories,
some still bare 

Never seems as bright
when you are gone
A dim comparison,
with half the lights on
Darkness under a shade
Beds perpetually made
A window with a view,
with the curtains drawn


Down, in the basement

Alone, in the yard
I knew it would hit me,
just not this hard

A simple fact of life,

but it feels like a test
They spread their wings,
and they leave the nest


I wander and I wonder,
cleaning up for one
Swept up in thoughts of you
until the work is done
A vacuum, and a broom
The dust in your room
Faint specks of yesterday,
settled, and then none 

The quiet of the night,
t
he silence of compromise
C
alendar on the fridge,
c
old comfort, as time flies
Circles, that tell me when
Two weeks until then
A small glimmer of hope,
faint in
a father’s eyes

 

Empty, in your bedroom
Alone, at the table
I glance to your pictures,
when my heart feels able

Sad solace in knowing
that it’s for the best
When life calls them,
and they leave the nest

 


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Strides

Strides

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We looked mostly straight ahead,

the first time we met
Walking, and small talking,
already at ease, as I got to my car
Yet, within the messages,
that lead us to that point,
I knew the enormity
of getting that far

No sense of haste
as we leisurely walk
Steadily paced
in time and talk
Self discovery, together,
with no real clock

Feeling more familiar 
with every block
20171126_170131 

We have picked up the pace,  
as we’ve moved along
Both ready and content
to be moving on
Putting miles, and smiles,
between us and the past
The more we’ve walked
The further we’ve gone

Side by side
our fingers entwined
Stride for stride,
both body and mind
Moving forward, together,
toward what we’ll find

Distancing ourselves
from what’s behind
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Continual but careful steps,
on a path to each other,
Patience, and anticipation,
for what we have in store
So far, so very good, for us,
From nerves and hesitation,
to comfortable conversations,
to moments meant for more

Nights planned
for more time alone
As we delve, we understand
our shared unknown
Time well spent, together,
we can call our own

Hand around hand,
in our comfort zone

Inevitable
Everything, and time,

plenty for us to discover
Our subtle intricacies,
strides for you with me
Walking and talking,
as we ease into us,
Heading toward whatever, 
whenever that may be
 

Dinner

20170801_104703
Dinner

I will raise a glass tonight
and drink to you.
Red wine with dinner
or, perhaps, a cold beer.
I will imagine,
as I sometimes do,
what it would be like
if you could still be here.

The wonderful comfort
of a family gathering.
A backyard barbecue
or, perhaps, a dinner out.
I will remember,
as I often do,
all the little things
that this life is about.

The simple satisfaction
of a table set for many.
Candles on a birthday cake
or, perhaps, an apple pie.
I will look around,
as I usually do,
feel extremely fortunate
and know exactly why.

Tonight, I will say a few words
in honour of you Norm.
Break bread with your granddaughters
and, perhaps, toss a salad in a bowl.
Sit at the head of the table,
as I proudly do,
as a kind and giving father 
content in his role.
—————
You would be eighty-five today,

if you were with us.
There is one less table setting
so, perhaps, you are not.
But we celebrate you today,
as we always will,
because this birthday meal
gives us food for thought.

 

Wavelength

           Wavelength
20160206_130843[1]
Apart in our own worlds

Regrettable but inevitable
Too much time in between.
Some texts and a phone call
Reflective two hour drive
Back to where we’ve been.

Always able to continue
Exactly where we left off
The bond will always hold.
Seamlessly joined together
Cohesive and carefree
Like yesterdays of old.

Vicarious rock and roll
Symbiotic music appreciation
Smiles and affirmative glances.
Twenty minute trade-offs

Guitars and emphatic drums
Meandering random dances.

Age irrelevant atmosphere
Perpetually young of heart
Suspended in our prime.
Reluctantly grown men
Trading personal tracks
While losing track of time.

Irreplaceable friends
Life long brothers
Taking time to play.
The comfort in knowing
That our yesterdays
Can always be today.

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Embraces and honesty
No subject we can’t broach
Confronting life with laughter.
Best men, best buddies
Beside for ups and downs
Before, during and after.

Team and battery mates

Sharing one wavelength
Signals and tell tale signs.
Uncommon commonalities
References unique to us
Through life and like minds.

Truly rewarding hours
Our innate predictability
That sense of what’s known.
The unspoken understanding
Essential and soothing
Inevitable, and our own.

Miles and hours apart
Responsibilities and reality
We make time for the game.FB_IMG_1454780080387[1]
With the sigh of our certainty
We carry on with who we are
Family, in everything but name.

Irreplaceable friends
Life long brothers
Taking time to play.
The comfort in knowing
That our yesterdays
Can always be today.

 

Wakefield

Banner
Wakefield
A small village
A huge heart
A desperate family
A new start

Perogies, and perspective
New friends, community, drinks
The comfort in knowing
What the best in us thinks
—–

Live music for what ails me,
My spirit needing a lift
The Black Sheep beckoned
My own pre-Christmas gift

20151210_171205[1]
A Weber Brother’s Christmas’…
That had to be good for my soul
I was alone, and a few hours early
 So, it would be fresh air and a stroll
—–

Intending to bide some time,
I curiously opened your door
Just looking for a unique pint
What I found,  was far more

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At first, it was exactly what I wanted
A small crowd, and ‘Perogy Night’!
Easing into the Kaffé 1870 atmosphere
Something about it, feeling just right

It didn’t take very long, however
The numbers began to grow
For live music and a fundraiser
More and more locals, I came to know

Photos Andre Forget

Kaffé 1870, Wakefield for Refugees
An awaiting host, a timely cause

A community coming together
Just like that, and just because

Words from the dedicated organizers,
A gregarious councillor, made everyone smile
The people, the closeness, the obvious warmth
My trip, already, well worth its while

Photos Andre Forget

It would become hard for me to leave
‘Godknowswhat’ was sublime
Extremely accomplished musicians
Donating their talent, and their time

I couldn’t count all of the terrific chats
I had found, in just a few hours
But, what I will never underestimate
Is community, and its obvious powers

Wakefield for Refugees sign showing $30,000 raised.

Seeing the good in so many people
And knowing, when I hear it
Experiencing your generosity

And sharing in your spirit

A raffle ticket, some Bean Fair coffee,
For my table, another round 
I had donated, but felt like the recipient
As I departed, Black Sheep bound
—–
20151215_142809[1]

Two Weber hours later
After another fantastic show
It was time for me to leave
But, I didn’t really want to go

Reflecting, smiling again,
And thinking, alone in my car
About an extremely fortunate family
About just how lucky they are

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Heading home, yet feeling closer
Invigorated, inspired, alive
Accompanied by this community
For my two-hour drive

Kaffé 1870, and The Black Sheep,
The warmest of patrons, and cold beer
And Wakefield, I am grateful
That circumstance brought me here
—–

Perogies, and perspective
New friends, community, drinks

The comfort in knowing
What the best of us thinks

A close community
An open heart
A fortunate family
A new start

Banner

 

Inevitable


Inevitability

is a crutch.
Bracing us
for a life event 
that will hurt
so much.

Parents will pass.
This is known.

Inevitably,
at that moment,
we will feel alone.


An unavoidable test.

Right nor wrong.
Facing
a harsh reality
that will
come along.

Parents will pass.
This is known.

Inevitably,
and eventually
we lose our own.

tears bench


Inevitability
is a balm.
Easing

our sorrow.
Palliative
and calm.

Parents will pass.
This is known.

Inevitability,
comfort in knowing
that we are not alone.


Certainty arrives.

 It always does.
Focus
on
the memories.
The reassurance
of what was.

Parents will pass.
This is known.

Inevitability,
a life, a legacy…
inevitably
etched in stone.

20170609_114735[1]

Solitude

          tears bench
Solitude

 I choose time alone
when I simply want to be
nearer to myself
 my solitude and me

A discreet place to revitalize my mind
Leaving the mess of the world behind
Discovery within my solitary den
Deciding where and how and when
Choosing to get lost, in order to find
A matter of self-reflection, that’s undefined
A substance of silence that finds my pen
Feelings are sought and selected again

Paper and pen for SURE
I need to escape
to where I should be
closer to myself
 my solitude and me

Sometimes separation is a necessary place
Withdrawing my emotions at my own pace
Safer within my sole situation
Restrained inside my contemplation
Choosing to retreat, to my own space
Saving my words, while saving face
Distancing myself from temptation
Separating sense from sensation

IMG_0575
I seek out true serenity
  comfort in where I will be
right there beside myself
 my solitude and me

A secluded place where my soul can stay
Understanding the world, by turning away
Immersed within my distinct seclusion
Savoring quality time without intrusion
Choosing the hours, from day to day
 To do my own thing, in my own way
Lured by a tranquility that’s paper thin
My particular private selfish place within

IMG_20150427_123034[1]


I choose this time alone

so I can just be
content with myself
 my solitude, and me

This peaceful place where I have grown
Recognizing the richness of self-unknown
Perception within my mind’s eye
Seeing the strength and knowing why
Choosing to internalize, on my own
Joined by my thoughts, I am never alone
 Together we laugh, we learn, we try
Finding perspective with myself and I

 

black and white piano

Setback


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Setback

The long and straight road
 just around this curve
The hard-earned happiness
that we all deserve…


Just when we felt ready

for our lives to improve
The rug is pulled out
weeks from our move
Naïve to true character
 the greed of this clown
Did not see it coming
and he took us down

Worse because of our wait
until the timing was right
Patience and compromise
and our goal was in sight
We lost what we found
in the blink of an eye
Contractual loop-hole
the worst reason why

Unethical and unchristian
in every last way
A faith that escapes me
 with no place to stay
Hard to understand
decency so easily lost
Unconcerned about effects
or the considerable cost

Anger and resentment
attached to this news
Struggling with my will
and the retribution blues
Sleepless once again
from selfish lack of reason
Leaving a family homeless
during the coldest season


Seasons change…


Battling these elements
we are not alone
The reason of others
has calmed my tone
Strength in our number
at the end of this rope
The warmth of words
is a blanket of hope

The comfort of friends
reassuring calm voices
Easing our urgency
by revealing our choices
Strength in our situation
a position of power
Snapped back to reality
like the coldest shower

It is just a matter of time
not too far away
The stars will align
and peace will come our way
Spiritual, solely because
we’ve reached from within
Recovered our dignity
despite their sin

The weight of the world
but it’s just one more rep
Spring is in our future

and it’s in our step
Put all of this behind us
 and write a different poem
Just another small setback
on our long  journey home


The long and straight road

is just around this curve
The hard-fought happiness
that we all deserve…

pic for Alive blog

INITIATIVE

                 

                 Initiativeone way

I sit alone in my wondering
and it clouds my mind

Nurture may not be your nature,
but there is something I should say.
Affection leads to affected,
when it only goes one way.

You put your gloved hand on
top of my knee
Reminding me of just how rare
that seems to be
Unknowing likely, perhaps
but noticeable to me

Alone behind a curtain of
sheer connotation
The way we should feel, belies
this sensation
Therein lies the rub, of our
unique situation

It distracts me from my ease,
as such
A simple gesture found within
a simple touch
And I don’t believe that it is really
asking
too much

I hold all of the initiative
and it bruises my heart

Nurture may not be your nature,
but there is something I should say.
Lonely leads to lonesome,
when it only goes one way.

A man should never talk about
such trivial things
The importance of touch, and all
that it brings
Or the way that the lack of it
sometimes stings

There are those who feel the same, I
would guess
It may seem absurd to others, who
need far less
But contact comforts me thoroughly, I
must confess

It does distract me from my ease,
as such
Our house is only so big, yet are insticts
seldom touch
And constantly reaching out to you, feels
like too muchimagesM5E0G21W

I grow weary of the initiative
and find myself hesitating

Nurture may not be your nature,
but there is something I should say.
Distant leads to distance,
when it only goes one way.

Companionship keeps me close, when
push comes to shove
I don’t doubt your sincerity or question

your love
And I do realize that it is your hand
inside that glove

I wish it didn’t matter to me,
but it just does.

I am preoccupied with the initiative.
Is it is just me?

 

Magnetic

                                                                                                      magnetic

           

Magnetic

There is a prevailing appeal
when I follow my instincts
This sense of significance
when we are apart
A persuasive force
that brings us together
It is this fascination
that grips my heart

There is a powerful pull
when I reach for you
This sense of enticement
that draws me near
An energy between us
when we’re together
It is to this positive attraction
that we must adhere

There is a quality to time
when we’re together
This sense of purpose
 that says we should be
An assurance in knowing
that we fit together
It is this realization
that stays with me

There is a healthy impatience
when I am waiting
This sense of expectation
with no pretenses
An excitement in knowing
that we’ll be together
It is this anticipation
that awakens my senses

There is a heartfelt relief
when I hear the door
This sensation of warmth
when I find you there
A comfort in knowing
that we are here together
It is this appreciation
that we will always share

There is a strength in numbers
when we’re together
 This sense of resolve
when it’s you with me
An undeniable bond
that we hold together
It is this real connection
that will always be.

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