Composure

COMPOSURE

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Searching for composure…

A calm and even keel,
Controlling what I feel,
Knowing when to conceal.
Thinking, before I speak,
Biding, before I seek.

Waiting out the weak,
 Learning how to deal


Gaining a better grip…

A handle on such things,
How my opinion rings,
That sarcasm stings.
A jab, from out of sight,
Catalyst, to a fight,
Bruising with its might.
The hurt that it brings


Restraining words that wound…

Ceased, before they’re said,
Bandaged, before they’re bled,
Repressing all the red.
More composed, with what I say,

More steady, with every day,
 Anger slowly drifting away.
Smooth sailing ahead


Finding my composure…

Speaking more to please,
Calming the stormy seas,
A consistent gentle breeze.
Words, clearly thought,
Words, carefully sought,
Words calmly wrought.
Shaped by their ease

Searching for, and gaining,
Finding, while restraining,
Retaining and maintaining,
my composure.
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Transfixed

Alive 5
Transfixed

I catch myself staring
Strangely focused in my trance
Seeing so much in an instant
With just a casual glance

It’s likely mere seconds
I am mesmerized, then clear
The silence of my reverie
gives way to what I hear

Words jumping out at me
and then easing into place
I become rapt in your way
In the character of your face

The way your eyes dance
along with each word
Your spirit adding substance
to what we’ve all heard

You smile, and then scowl
as the conversation turns
Imbedded in your opinion

and the respect that it earns

Formulating as you listen
Anxious, with more to share
That little scar rises
like it’s keenly aware

Impatiently you wait
until it comes back to you
You burst out a little early
It’s just something that you do

Spilling out your conviction
with all that you have got
Pouring your passion
into every sharp thought

Meaning exactly what you say
You say exactly what you mean
Words that come from your heart
Faithful to where they’ve been

While I don’t always agree
with everything that you say
 I duly respect your tenacity
And I especially love your way…

The way you light up a room
with your passion and sincerity
The way you express yourself

with no need for clarity

The way you put it out there
with nothing to hide
The way you can agitate me
and stir me up inside

The way that you are steadfast
with nothing up your sleeve
The way your honesty reels me in
when my opinions want to leave

The way you never hesitate
to show who you are
The way my love approaches
when I see you from afar

The way you invest in life
Always ready, willing and able
The way that you transfix me
as I look across the table

 

Diversion

Diversion

Fifteen minutes…
Getting away

Dulling the edge
s
Finding my ease
Slowing the pace

 Feeling the breeze

Life swirls all around me
Twisting, and rubbing
against my grain
Spinning, and brushing
against my brain
A whirlwind of emotions
Contorting, and slamming
against my pain
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Fifteen minutes…
Composing alone

Gathering my thoughts
Diverting my mind
Focusing my attention
Loosening my bind

Soothed by my distractions
Standing at the window
watching the rain
Listening to the birds’
cheerful refrain
Getting outside of myself

 Searching for anything
to divert the pain
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Seeing the bottles
trying to abstain
Seeking to exist
beyond my bane

Fifteen minutes…
Diversion

Away
Alone
A selfish burden
I make my own

Turn

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TURN

I stop where the highway ends
Pausing at the bottom of the hill
At the intersection of here and now
where time seems to stand still
Just enough time for me to smile
Time enough to look both ways
The right time at the right place
A right turn to the best of days

A right and then a quick left
To where my awakened mind sees
Down one last secluded road
under a canopy of trees
A canopy of yellow, white and green
Scattered sunlight streaking through
A canopy that guides me along
To the home that I made with you

A home full of ease and inspiration
Where my contented heart will stay
That rejuvenates my weary soul
at the end of another long day
At the end of the gravel lane
On the west end of the lake
One last left up the driveway
Is the best turn that I make

A definite turn for the better
At the end of our long year
The best turn for our life together
is the turn that led us here
To the edge of nature’s bounty
With a love for life as our connection
The right time, and the right place
A turn in the right direction

Inevitable


Inevitability

is a crutch.
Bracing us
for a life event 
that will hurt
so much.

Parents will pass.
This is known.

Inevitably,
at that moment,
we will feel alone.


An unavoidable test.

Right nor wrong.
Facing
a harsh reality
that will
come along.

Parents will pass.
This is known.

Inevitably,
and eventually
we lose our own.

tears bench


Inevitability
is a balm.
Easing

our sorrow.
Palliative
and calm.

Parents will pass.
This is known.

Inevitability,
comfort in knowing
that we are not alone.


Certainty arrives.

 It always does.
Focus
on
the memories.
The reassurance
of what was.

Parents will pass.
This is known.

Inevitability,
a life, a legacy…
inevitably
etched in stone.

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Awakening

Awakening
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Perpetually incapable
of sleeping in
Yet entirely content
for the day to begin
My muse and I
Both wide awake
With tea, with coffee
With the sound of the lake

Off to her work
Me, to my pen
Equal parts solitude
and together again
Alone with my thoughts
Joined by my ease
A limitless view
The sound of the breeze

Between work and living
The grind or the gain
Managing my potential
Lessening my pain
Relief from the scalpel
A new home on the bay
Endless possibilities
A brand new day

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Impending deadlines
Urgency that can wait
Time, of the essence
Tomorrow, too late
Adrenalin fed future
My opportunity knocks
Like a rush of creativity
Like the waves on the rocks

Changes are in order
Where and how I live
Untapped opportunity
All that I can give
Expecting my best
 Wanting even more
Reaching for happiness
 The waves to the shore

Between work and living
Less pressure, less pain
More of these moments
 Everything to gain
Endless possibilities
I am wide awake
A much better man
A new life on the lake
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Light

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Light

I am putting my heart into something new
And I have to say that I love the view
A panorama of serenity and country ease
Promise for as far as the hopeful eye sees
With glistening water to the left and right
A glimpse into a future, filled with light

The light of change, the light of the new
The light of a tomorrow with me and you
With all of us together, on any night
In the hearts of my family, I find the light


It’s not about religion, or God, or heaven

It’s the strength inherent in our group of seven
Two pillars to reinforce walls of the essential
For five young lives with boundless potential
Two who encourage what is morally right
And five burgeoning rays of limitless light

Light filled with friends and husbands and wives
The light of tomorrow is the light of our lives
Everyone feels welcome, on any night
In the of strength of this family, I find the light

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Rooms filled with our conversations and laughter
Walls that embrace images of before and after

 The warmth of a fire, and a comfortable bed
And the life of realities that lies ahead
Seeing and feeling and knowing it’s right
All of us reflected in this reassuring light

The light of this potential is within our sight
The light of tomorrow, expansive and bright
 Under the moon and the stars, on any night
In the warmth of our family, I find this light

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INITIATIVE

                 

                 Initiativeone way

I sit alone in my wondering
and it clouds my mind

Nurture may not be your nature,
but there is something I should say.
Affection leads to affected,
when it only goes one way.

You put your gloved hand on
top of my knee
Reminding me of just how rare
that seems to be
Unknowing likely, perhaps
but noticeable to me

Alone behind a curtain of
sheer connotation
The way we should feel, belies
this sensation
Therein lies the rub, of our
unique situation

It distracts me from my ease,
as such
A simple gesture found within
a simple touch
And I don’t believe that it is really
asking
too much

I hold all of the initiative
and it bruises my heart

Nurture may not be your nature,
but there is something I should say.
Lonely leads to lonesome,
when it only goes one way.

A man should never talk about
such trivial things
The importance of touch, and all
that it brings
Or the way that the lack of it
sometimes stings

There are those who feel the same, I
would guess
It may seem absurd to others, who
need far less
But contact comforts me thoroughly, I
must confess

It does distract me from my ease,
as such
Our house is only so big, yet are insticts
seldom touch
And constantly reaching out to you, feels
like too muchimagesM5E0G21W

I grow weary of the initiative
and find myself hesitating

Nurture may not be your nature,
but there is something I should say.
Distant leads to distance,
when it only goes one way.

Companionship keeps me close, when
push comes to shove
I don’t doubt your sincerity or question

your love
And I do realize that it is your hand
inside that glove

I wish it didn’t matter to me,
but it just does.

I am preoccupied with the initiative.
Is it is just me?

 

Comfort

She has this certain calm.
A gentle way of turning phrase
A quiet comfort attitude
An ease to her ways.

Life’s rule is seldom fair
At times downright cruel
And painful necessary choices
Bring fire from this fuel

Battered and forever bruised
Survival has made her strong
She’s fought true demons
So much right, so much wrong

 

Yet, she has this certain calm.
A pleasant view of her storm
A quiet comfort magnitude
A serenity of safe and warm.
 

Nurturing through years of turmoil
Is hard enough alone
Raising a child in her world
Grinds patience to the bone
 
She has to portray positivity
From a negative point of view
Has to shoulder all of the weight
And carry enough for two
 

Still, she has this certain calm.
A peaceful, subtle grace
A quiet comfort solitude
A gentle smile, a pretty face.
 

There is just something about her
An aura of ‘welcome here’
Her hazy eyes are happy
Her heart is crystal clear
 
 Every day is still a struggle
New challenges, same fears
You just know she’ll make it
She’s earned some happy years

 

Because she has this certain calm.
A sure sense of what is real
A quiet comfort attitude
A spiritual, contagious even keel…

 
A comfortable way to feel.
 

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