Mine

MINE
I was inching away from everything
that I had tried so hard to preserve
Taking the smallest of careful steps,
as I negotiated the next curve
Having spent far too much energy
accepting less than I deserve
Gradually reaching the realization
that I have more than enough nerve
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So, I am making changes

For me
Found someone who sees the very best
in me
Nearer to the fun and confident essence
of who I used to be
Experiencing life, one day at a time
For me

I had the best of all of the intentions

but my will seldom found the way
I just needed some selfish motivation,
and to heed the words I would say
When it’s broken, you must fix it,
rather than put it off, for yet another day
And that meant doing it myself,
believing, this is the price I’ll pay

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So, I am making changes

For me
Bought a nice new, reliable vehicle
just for me
I am getting ever closer
to the way things should be
Closer to the life that I choose
For me

The constant of the truly good people

who are always always there
Family, colleagues, closest friends,
listening, simply because they care
Honesty, in the face of my best interest,
with only good intentions to share
Helping to get me to a better place
and then joining me, no matter where

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I am making these changes
For me
A newish job, and a great new house
For me
I am now looking only forward,
to the place I want to be
Where life and love and happiness meet
With me

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Consolation

Wine comes in at the mouth
And love comes in at the eye.
That’s all we shall know for truth
Before we grow old and die.
I lift the glass to my mouth.
I look at you, and I sigh.
William Butler Yeats – A Drinking Song (1915)

 


Consolation

Just me, alone,
raising my glass to you…

 It was eight years ago today.
I remember the exact conversation,
just as I clearly remember the date.
“We both have the same sensibility, I said.
We’re like a fun young old couple, you and I.
It’s really just a shame
that I was born fifteen years too early
and you was born fifteen years too late.” 

It was our last night together.
You were moving away soon after,
so I said good-bye then, rather than wait.
You responded, with barely a hesitation.
“You know that I never cared about that.
We were great together.
The real shame, for us, is
we were both born a hundred years too late.”


So here’s a toast,
to being an old soul.
A toast,
to being young at heart.
A glass raised,
to being both.
To
the end.
And to the start.

 

When day begins to break
I count my good and bad,
Being wakeful for her sake,
Remembering what she had,
What eagle look still shows,
While up from my heart’s root
So great a sweetness flows
I shake from head to foot.
W.B.Y. – Friends (1915)

 

 

Worry


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Worry

You worry about us
while I worry about you
My wounds have mostly healed
Yours, are still unfairly new

Still vulnerable, still susceptible,
Still affected by so much
Bruised around the edges
Still tender to the touch
 Memories, there on the wall
Reminders, flashing on the screen
Taking you back to a hurt
that never should have been
Pictures and question marks
Still images, still fresh 
Years of mixed emotions,
rubbing against your flesh
The occasions, the situations
With family, with friends
The sudden jolt to your system
When some of your past attends
Incessant and intrusive probing
Concerned people, hassling you
The pangs from a harsh reality,
that may or may not be true
Occasional reminders,
that prick you like a pin
Sharp and pointed circumstance
Jabbing at your skin

Rumours, and stories that swirl
Of others, going through the same
Open secrets and indiscretions
The deflecting of the blame
Sad and similar symptoms,
that you reluctantly understand 
Taking you an unhealthy distance
from the life that you had planned

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You worry about us
 and I worry about you
 This is what I can see
This is all I can do

There is pain that I recognize
Sore spots, we have both got
Other aches, I can understand
Worse ones, that I cannot
Nights, together in your home
Putting myself in your place
Hours, rapt deep in our conversation
Moments, spent lost in your face
The nuances of your smile
The emotions, found in your eyes
A shimmering well of melancholy
behind a wavering disguise
The sharp, cruel jabs of pain,
that stab your heart like a knife
The tears, that occupy my mind,
as we sit, surrounded by your life
Yet, there is no place I’d rather be
There with you, trying to comprehend
Distracting you and laughing with you
As your partner, as your friend
Taking you to a fun and happy now,
And sitting beside you there
Giving only me, and who I am,
In every minute that we share
Knowing, I have zero urge to sit
where someone else has sat
That I am one hundred percent yours
That I can promise you that
I have my steadfast morals
I have my own unique charms
I have this love for you,
and I have two strong arms

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You worry about us
I worry about you
I promise you my honesty
That is the most I can do

Implicit

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Implicit

I sense it in your demeanor

I hear it in your voice
You’d appreciate my input
to steer you to your choice
You are hesitant. I understand.
The long-term is your concern
You digest the output
from my live and learn

The strength of our friendship
is our mutual respect
My honest thoughts
are all you can expect
Frank and forward,
telling it like it is
My honest observations
go something like this

Age is just a number,
as the saying goes
It’s really just a matter
of who knows
Fifty-three, the new forty-three
Forty-two, so thirty-two?
All that matters, really,
is her,  plus you

Perspective is everything,
when it comes to the heart
You are far better together
than when you’re apart
Fulfillment is truly reciprocal
It’s all about how you feel
If it feels best together,
what you have is real

So much common outlook,
that it’s effortless to share
Life is far more full
when you’re both there
The physical, the cerebral
The intimacy, the fun
Life seems more complete
when you two are one

We are in absolute agreement,
that the enemy is regret
It becomes more assured and clear
with the further we get
My words are implicit,

coming from the right place
As honest, and reassuring,
as the smile on your face


I sensed it in your ease
I can hear it in your voice
Both relaxed, and relieved
with your obvious choice
You are happy. Bottom line.
Nothing selfish in that smile
You’ve known what you want
for quite a while

Glass


      GlassIMG_20150514_155248[1]

Sun through glass
filtered by tree
Silent and still
awakening me
Lift up my eyes
morning anew
Curtains left open
enhancing the view

IMG_20150514_152956[1]Half-empty glass
poured for me
Pills and capsules
numbering three
Medicinal relief
no other way
Medicinal haze
engulfing my day

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shadowed by trees
Calm and complacent
awaiting the breeze
Breath of fresh air
comes out to play
Rippled tranquility
enlivening the bay


Half-full glassIMG_20150514_163720[1]

poured for me
Brother and friend
patient makes three
Medicinal release
freedom and fun
Prescription fulfilled
envisioning the sun

Recipe

Recipe

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The recipe
for happiness
is all of us
mixed together…

The right combination
of ingredients
are ‘if’, and ‘when’,
not ‘how’ or ‘whether’.

If we are welcome
to new sensations,
and if we try
unique things…
When we keep
an open mind,
we will savour
whatever life brings.

If we throw in
a pinch of patience,
and if we measure in
a cup of fun…
W
hen all of our lives
are blended together,

there is more to enjoy
for everyone.

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If we are anxious
to say “yes”,
and if we think,
“of course we should”…
When we stir in
some adventure,
life will always
taste good.

If we stay willing
to sample
and if we share
and we explore…
When we add in
some time,
we will enjoy
that much more.

If we can combine
these ingredients,
we will laugh
and we will thrive…
When we share this
recipe for happiness
we will feel
even more alive.

The ‘if’ and ‘when’
are “here and now”…
so preheat the oven
for 365.

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Discretion

DiscretionIMG_20141102_142927[1]

Stopped instantly in your tracks.
Waves of shock and then disbelief.

Her picture right there for all to see
The headline, as plain as can be
Words that strike at your very core
Shaken by the thought of reading more
You dare to look, despite the knowing
Helpless to keep it all from showing
Putting your back against the wall
Needing support as your barriers fall

Because now,
you are weakened by what you’ve read,
and you can’t move ahead.


Staggered by this second-hand news.

An instantaneous jolt of clarity. 

Taken directly to a time and a place

Flashing back, to that perfect face
A playful smile you will never forget
The honest heart of your last regret
An ideal situation, some would say
Judged yourself and you walked away
A circumstance you left behind
Rarely ever crossing your mind

Until now.
You are taken aback by what you’ve heard,
but you can’t say a word.


Inhibited by the same weight of discretion.

Just as private as it was back then.

Age, and then distance, were both too far
You sullenly
remove your suit from the car
Knowing what no one else needs to know
That it’s far more respectful not to go
Keeping your distance is probably best
Questions to avoid in the eyes of the rest
Despite yourself, you know what to do
Closure is for the family, not for you

For now.
 You are constrained by the reasons why,
 so you cannot say good-bye.

 

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A peculiar sensation of personal loss.
Over someone and something that you let go.

Finding yourself alone with your despair

Few who could really understand or care
Absolutely no shame in what you feel

Convenient secrets, you chose to conceal
Fleeting memories, you fought to dismiss
Coming around, when it comes to this
A conscious grip on things back then
You have to confront those choices again

But now,
you need time and space with what you know.
 Because you have to let her go…
again.

 

Local


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Local

There is something missing in suburbia…

A city has them, scattered all around
A buzz of activity in any small town
It’s where the locals can often be found.
A distinct identity for most of these places
Where’s there’s no shortage of friendly faces.
A wheel of houses, with a familiar hub
I
t’s commonly known as your local pub.

There should be one in every neighbourhood…

A place to meet, after the daily grind
A place to relax, laugh and unwind
In Canada, however, we are woefully behind.
They’ve been doing it in Europe for years
Relaxing after work, with friends and beers.
Like a charter member, of the best club
You are a loyal patron of your local pub.

An avenue for embracing subdivided life…

A perfect chance for neighbours to meet and talk
Taking advantage of the hour on the clock

A simple stroll, to the very next block.
Have a kitchen with food, and include a menu
So the kids can come and enjoy it with you.
Just sit right down, order up some grub
They’re cooking for you at your local pub.

A convenient way to enhance your day…

Decrease the list of “friends you seldom see”
A helpful boost to your local economy
Everyone knows
 that it’s the ‘place to be’.
No need to worry about driving your car
A fact that eliminates many a bar.
No need for transit, or a taxi stub
It’s walking distance to your local pub.

It seems pretty basic when you add it all up…

Neighbours getting together in one place. +

 An escape from the day-to-day of the daily race. +
  A friendly smile on every familiar face. +
Families gathering to meet and greet. +
Saving on gas, because you use your feet. +
Having said all of that, herein lies the rub
= My subdivision,
 and I, need a local pub.

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Twelve

Twelve

On this day when you turn twelve years old
you have the whole world at your feet.
Strive for whatever your heart desires
and be sure not to skip a single beat.

Read all the books you can grab
to learn and experience and grow.
Hold on to each lesson and each adventure.
The more you read, the more you know.

Take full advantage of every opportunity
to play or to travel with family and friends.
Treat each new pathway as a new beginning
and always find out where each road ends.

Dare to believe and take some small risks.
Sample new foods and try new things.
Be confident and sure in all your abilities.
Give your best effort to all this life brings.

Make the most of your every day
by embracing all that you enjoy.
There is no reason to hurry up
and every excuse to just be a boy.

Life is a novel that has many chapters
An ongoing story about our self.
Begin the next journey by turning the page
and leap headlong into being twelve.

                                                                        

                                                                                 To Alec From Gary    August 13, 2013

                                                                                     Twelve blog pic

Lucid

                      Lucid 
I take a moment to reflect.

It’s
the way she makes me feel
her natural sexual appeal
Exquisite eyes, a lucid mirror
it’s what I see that’s real

More to her that meets my eyes.
H
er curves where shape should be
her smile that stays with me
Wisps of hair, a playful gaze
imperfections I choose to see

Wanting just to hold her close.
A
n instinctive need to protect
an urge that I did not expect
She seems so alive, a pure soul
with
a heart I won’t neglect.

The simple gestures and glances.
W
e share a moment of know
we see the path and we take it slow
Hand to cheek, a tender touchpexels-photo-311039.jpeg
a bond that can only grow.

Back to the proper beginning.
T
o this place of hopeful and true
to this spark of me and you
Starting with fun, a shared adventure
this sense of something new

Absence elevates our hungry minds.
We must
 satisfy what we implore
we can barely close the door
Enough for two, a passionate pair
an appetite for so much more

Expectations set aside for both our sakes.
A
n honest effort to suppress a race
in our steady measured pace
Discovering more each day, 
reservations that hold our place

There’s only so much to say.
W
e are here in the new and now
where life controls what we allow
Wishful words, a stop-gap measure
and the bridge to when and how

No real hurry now that we know.
T
here is this time that’s on our side
so much more we haven’t tried
Lets enjoy each moment, a life journey
just sit back and enjoy the ride

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