Just two, on a care free Saturday night
Alone together, while we have the chance
Shared moments such nights enhance
An exchange of music, a kitchen dance
An exchange of smiles, a knowing glance

Sitting sideways on the couch
Looking at you looking at me
Your warm hand, resting on my knee
Seeing exactly who I want you to see
Who I really am, not who I might be

Comfortable with why and where we are
The conversation eases to and fro
A flicker of candles, the music low
Content to have nowhere else to go
Content in knowing what we already know

My lips back slowly away from yours
Your head still tilting, slightly to the side
A pause, as thoughts and words collide
My heart swells, with nothing to hide
My stomach churning, stirred up inside

A real and honest instinct, I choose to resist
A heartfelt compliment, uttered instead
We blow out the candles, and we go to bed
With the tug of more inside of my head
With those huge little words, left unsaid



I am still not used to it.
Both of them only half the time
was hard enough to accept.
Then the teenage years came
and they became independent.
Half the time became
half the time, half the time.
Then came graduation,
and jobs, and university for one.
And now it’s half of them,
half of half the time.
In less than a year and a half
it will be none of them
almost all the time.
That’s life, I suppose…20171130_094348


Our new family home,
that I bought to share
A shell of a house
without you there
Echoes in the halls
Walls, inside of walls
Some framed with memories,
some still bare 

Never seems as bright
when you are gone
A dim comparison,
with half the lights on
Darkness under a shade
Beds perpetually made
A window with a view,
with the curtains drawn

Down, in the basement

Alone, in the yard
I knew it would hit me,
just not this hard

A simple fact of life,

but it feels like a test
They spread their wings,
and they leave the nest

I wander and I wonder,
cleaning up for one
Swept up in thoughts of you
until the work is done
A vacuum, and a broom
The dust in your room
Faint specks of yesterday,
settled, and then none 

The quiet of the night,
he silence of compromise
alendar on the fridge,
old comfort, as time flies
Circles, that tell me when
Two weeks until then
A small glimmer of hope,
faint in
a father’s eyes


Empty, in your bedroom
Alone, at the table
I glance to your pictures,
when my heart feels able

Sad solace in knowing
that it’s for the best
When life calls them,
and they leave the nest



You instantly stop everything
Eating, drinking, breathing

Hesitate before continuing
Pausing, considering, reading

You float for a moment
Hovering, above the news
Suspended, out-of-body
With the worst of views

It just doesn’t seem possible
Conceivable, thinkable, plausible
Yet, there it is, clearly legible
Believable, credible, probable

Seeing it, in black and white
Jagged, brutal, true
Unconscionable meets real
As it penetrates you
Dead. Killed. Murdered.
Gone.  Lost.  Taken
Certain. Senseless. Final.
Deflated. Shattered. Shaken

Blood and air draining
Legs, faltering below
You sink into the chair
You have read, and you know

Bold, pointed letters
Piercing hearts, puncturing lives
Cutting, stabbing, slicing
Words, as sharp as knives








A small village
A huge heart
A desperate family
A new start

Perogies, and perspective
New friends, community, drinks
The comfort in knowing
What the best in us thinks

Live music for what ails me,
My spirit needing a lift
The Black Sheep beckoned
My own pre-Christmas gift

A Weber Brother’s Christmas’…
That had to be good for my soul
I was alone, and a few hours early
 So, it would be fresh air and a stroll

Intending to bide some time,
I curiously opened your door
Just looking for a unique pint
What I found,  was far more


At first, it was exactly what I wanted
A small crowd, and ‘Perogy Night’!
Easing into the Kaffé 1870 atmosphere
Something about it, feeling just right

It didn’t take very long, however
The numbers began to grow
For live music and a fundraiser
More and more locals, I came to know

Photos Andre Forget

Kaffé 1870, Wakefield for Refugees
An awaiting host, a timely cause

A community coming together
Just like that, and just because

Words from the dedicated organizers,
A gregarious councillor, made everyone smile
The people, the closeness, the obvious warmth
My trip, already, well worth its while

Photos Andre Forget

It would become hard for me to leave
‘Godknowswhat’ was sublime
Extremely accomplished musicians
Donating their talent, and their time

I couldn’t count all of the terrific chats
I had found, in just a few hours
But, what I will never underestimate
Is community, and its obvious powers

Wakefield for Refugees sign showing $30,000 raised.

Seeing the good in so many people
And knowing, when I hear it
Experiencing your generosity

And sharing in your spirit

A raffle ticket, some Bean Fair coffee,
For my table, another round 
I had donated, but felt like the recipient
As I departed, Black Sheep bound

Two Weber hours later
After another fantastic show
It was time for me to leave
But, I didn’t really want to go

Reflecting, smiling again,
And thinking, alone in my car
About an extremely fortunate family
About just how lucky they are


Heading home, yet feeling closer
Invigorated, inspired, alive
Accompanied by this community
For my two-hour drive

Kaffé 1870, and The Black Sheep,
The warmest of patrons, and cold beer
And Wakefield, I am grateful
That circumstance brought me here

Perogies, and perspective
New friends, community, drinks

The comfort in knowing
What the best of us thinks

A close community
An open heart
A fortunate family
A new start







Searching for composure…

A calm and even keel,
Controlling what I feel,
Knowing when to conceal.
Thinking, before I speak,
Biding, before I seek.

Waiting out the weak,
 Learning how to deal

Gaining a better grip…

A handle on such things,
How my opinion rings,
That sarcasm stings.
A jab, from out of sight,
Catalyst, to a fight,
Bruising with its might.
The hurt that it brings

Restraining words that wound…

Ceased, before they’re said,
Bandaged, before they’re bled,
Repressing all the red.
More composed, with what I say,

More steady, with every day,
 Anger slowly drifting away.
Smooth sailing ahead

Finding my composure…

Speaking more to please,
Calming the stormy seas,
A consistent gentle breeze.
Words, clearly thought,
Words, carefully sought,
Words calmly wrought.
Shaped by their ease

Searching for, and gaining,
Finding, while restraining,
Retaining and maintaining,
my composure.





Friendships shape a life

Make it worth living
Memories from the gift
Memories in the giving

Connecting you to two lives
A defining link to your past
A certain part of your future
Friends first, and friends last

Remaining close in spirit
With no matter how far
It’s not just what you do
A friend is who you are

Inside jokes with just a glance
Self-effacing, imitation to the letter
Funnier from the shared experience
The more absurd, the more the better
Acting your age always optional

Speak your mind, or from your gut
Colourful language, to be expected
Opinions matter, no matter what

Trusting that it stays here
The bond as strong as the word
The vault is always left open
But once it’s said, it is once heard
Criticizing when only required
Subtle reminders of any pretense
Calmly putting you in your place
And you knowing that it makes sense
Feet BW

Friendships shape a life

Make it worth living
Memories from the gift
Memories in the giving…

Hearing the hidden meaning
Of the thoughts left unsaid
The silence between the words
The struggles inside your head
Protecting necessary solitude

When reality takes its toll
Sharing pleasure, dividing pain
Two friends, a common soul

Staying right beside you
Throughout the unplanned
Still managing to realize
When they don’t understand
Strength in that number

The enduring power of twoIMG_20140701_131049[1]
Doing whatever it takes
And knowing
what to do

Friendships shape a life
Make it worth living
Memories from the gift
Memories in the giving

Connecting you to two lives
A defining link to your past
A certain part of your future
Friends first, and friends last
Remaining close in spirit
With no matter how far
It’s not just what you do
A friend is who you areMarley and Pete









Time and again
I have felt it
That pang of emptiness
the weight of a sigh.
Sometimes I suppress it
sometimes I don’t
But every time…
I hate good-bye.

I could see it as

I held your hand
that knowing look
in your eyes
Even as you struggled 
you recognized
my struggle
with good-byes

Some impressions
sink in and stay
Unselfish imprints
the enduring part
Personal reminders
a life-long spirit
Eternally residing
inside your heart

I knew our bond
 would never die
 I saw it, as we said

What we shared

was short but sweet
wrought with
what ifs and whys
I hated breaking
your honest heart
Even more than
I hate good-byes

Sometimes it is not
meant to be
Excruciating decisions
painful choices
Personal priorities
conscious realities
Mindful guidance
from internal voices

I apologized for
the reasons why
Even as we said

You gave us twelve

memory filled years
 But moving on
and out was wise
One final time 
I closed your door
 Reminding me of why
I hate good-byes

Someone put a wedge
between us
Breaking down walls
is always tough
Family and love are
reasons for change
Love and change
were reason enough

I felt the memories
and began to cry
Pausing, as I said

It is just a part

of who I am
It does not matter
how hard I try
The simple soul
inside of me
Simply hates to say

We can’t hold on
to forever
Inevitable and circumstance
will come along.
That doesn’t mean
that it won’t hurt
So say good-bye…
 but stay strong.





 My left arm straight out
I wake up locked in place
right arm pinned under me
exasperation on my face.
Eyes-only glance to my left
3:17 on the clock
despite the untimely hour
I need to get up and walk.
A struggle to just get started
so familiar and frustrating
slowly turn onto my back
where another knot is waiting.
The motion too abrupt
I hear her wearily say
“is it still bothering you?
  I hope you are okay?”

The pain is now both of ours
awake in the dead of night
nothing seems to change
 will I ever feel alright?

Do I sit up or do I roll?

either way is a chore
which move tonight?
the best way to the floor?
Eventually I am standing
legs weary under the weight
I finally feel my body
it doesn’t feel great.
Sluggish, sore and irritated
I consume a gasp of air
regain some composure
as much as I can bear.
Knowing she’d like some water
I’m too spent to think
“I am getting some pills
can I get you a drink?”

The cat greets me with a look
as I flick on the kitchen light
as if to say “not again…
 will you ever be alright?”

Taking stock of my aches

I try to shake them out
wrist a pulsing whimper
shoulders a throbbing shout.
Stillness seems wiser
let my thoughts unwind
“concentrate elsewhere
relax and avert your mind.”
Leaning against the counter
I stare blankly at the floor
choke down two tablets
then swallow one more.
I need to get back to bed
the morning will be rough
the microwave says 3:39
  my body says “enough.”

Same tired routine
night after night after night
nothing seems to change
 will I ever feel alright?

Back to my drowsing beauty
dozing none too deep
her eyes loosely closed

hovering near sleep.
  “Are you feeling okay?”
raises her head, as I lie
“just the usual” I say
and we both know why.
Her hand touches my arm
“try to get some rest”
her calm voice soothing
puts her head on my chest.
For a moment I forget
the pain politely subsides
peace eventually arrives
and she’s the reason why.

Despite the same worries
and another rocky night
despite the constant pain
she makes me feel alright.






There is a prevailing appeal
when I follow my instincts
This sense of significance
when we are apart
A persuasive force
that brings us together
It is this fascination
that grips my heart

There is a powerful pull
when I reach for you
This sense of enticement
that draws me near
An energy between us
when we’re together
It is to this positive attraction
that we must adhere

There is a quality to time
when we’re together
This sense of purpose
 that says we should be
An assurance in knowing
that we fit together
It is this realization
that stays with me

There is a healthy impatience
when I am waiting
This sense of expectation
with no pretenses
An excitement in knowing
that we’ll be together
It is this anticipation
that awakens my senses

There is a heartfelt relief
when I hear the door
This sensation of warmth
when I find you there
A comfort in knowing
that we are here together
It is this appreciation
that we will always share

There is a strength in numbers
when we’re together
 This sense of resolve
when it’s you with me
An undeniable bond
that we hold together
It is this real connection
that will always be.

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