Kris

Sometimes we let life get in the way of the simple but important things…like friendships. I made a promise to myself to never feel the sting of such regret again.
It hurts too much.

                         Kris
Woke up to a beautiful morning    20180308_083200
with nothing but sky and blue
The sun graciously greeted me
and I immediately thought of you

I thought about these past two years
mortality, and time, weighing on my mind
I thought about losing touch with friends
and wishing that I could rewind


To a deck chair on a porch

and a cold pint in my hand
To a conversation we once had
while listening to my favourite band

“I appreciate their talent”, you said,
as you tried to give it a chance.
But when it came right down to it,
“it just doesn’t make me dance.”

“What’s the point of music, you asked,
unless it brings you to your feet?
It has to have danceable lyrics.
And where’s the danceable beat?!”

And to emphasize your point
you attempted to dance along
But “the guitar was too heavy,
and the rhythm was all wrong.”

This didn’t slow you down though
and you improvised some moves
Then you dropped your pint onto the deck
and it spilled between the grooves

The whole situation seemed hilarious
and we laughed until we were both flush
I blamed it on your dancing
while you blamed it on RUSH

This became an ongoing theme
whenever we got together
Lousy food was because of RUSH
and so was lousy weather


Which brings me back to this morning

to the sun and a sky so blue
Time and mortality on my mind
and to fond memories of you

You always had a unique perspective
a contagious smile and a playful grin
But you also had so much more
and it all came from within

A huge heart for everyone
and an ease to your ways
I just wish we’d kept in touch
and could share more sunny days

Miss ya big guy…you were one of a kind.

Gary
May 8, 2014

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Limitation

The unique thing
about regret
is that
the less you experience
the more you get        – G.G.

                                   Pic3 for Alive
Limitation

I’m taking a bit of a risk,
but what if I didn’t…

I’d rather live in the moment
than live with regret
Take a chance on what I want
and grab all I can get
No stop signs
No hesitation 
No blurred lines
No limitation
I intend to make the most
of this one-time life
Bring the best of it all
into plain sight
Exhausting each day
Exhausted each night

My motivation can be seen
in unique places
In hopeful eyes
On mourning faces
Times of celebration
Times of dread
Times to remember
Time, to look ahead

IMG_20141215_173356[1]

I’d rather look to the future
than look back with regret
Embrace all of those who inspire
and give back as I get
No retreat
No reservation
No boundaries
No limitation
I intend to stretch my mind
to greater lengths
Flights of fancy
and fanciful flights
Lifting the best of me
to loftier heights

My motivation can be found
in unique places
In beautiful smiles
On candle lit faces
People we meet
People we admire
People we love
People who inspire

pexels-photo-321444.jpeg

I’d rather embrace the possibilities
than accept the regret
Put myself completely out there
Give more than I get
No misunderstanding
No misinterpretation
No incompletes
No limitation
I intend to hold nothing back
in my quest to grow

Express my self
to all who should know
Take the best of me along
to wherever I go

Live this life for every moment
Experience more, every chance I get
Taking risks, and taking strides
Staying ahead of my regret

Implicit

20171101_173406
Implicit

I sense it in your demeanor

I hear it in your voice
You’d appreciate my input
to steer you to your choice
You are hesitant. I understand.
The long-term is your concern
You digest the output
from my live and learn

The strength of our friendship
is our mutual respect
My honest thoughts
are all you can expect
Frank and forward,
telling it like it is
My honest observations
go something like this

Age is just a number,
as the saying goes
It’s really just a matter
of who knows
Fifty-three, the new forty-three
Forty-two, so thirty-two?
All that matters, really,
is her,  plus you

Perspective is everything,
when it comes to the heart
You are far better together
than when you’re apart
Fulfillment is truly reciprocal
It’s all about how you feel
If it feels best together,
what you have is real

So much common outlook,
that it’s effortless to share
Life is far more full
when you’re both there
The physical, the cerebral
The intimacy, the fun
Life seems more complete
when you two are one

We are in absolute agreement,
that the enemy is regret
It becomes more assured and clear
with the further we get
My words are implicit,

coming from the right place
As honest, and reassuring,
as the smile on your face


I sensed it in your ease
I can hear it in your voice
Both relaxed, and relieved
with your obvious choice
You are happy. Bottom line.
Nothing selfish in that smile
You’ve known what you want
for quite a while

Butterfly?

Butterfly?

Epihany

The same stubborn scenario
The same view every night
A silhouette, close to the edge
A moth under the light
The echo of my thoughts
On infinite repeat
A schizophrenic mind field
Of two and a half feet

Turned one hundred and eighty
In a blanketed cocoon
A butterfly to a moth
Under the light of the moon
A stark and palpable silence
An insurmountable rut
Urges, kept at arm’s length
Until my eyes flutter shut

Take me back to my muse
Release me from this storm
From the cold of my creation
The bitter back to the warm
From this tempest in a teapot
 These chilling winds of blame
 The frigid reality each night
The moth back to the flame

An exasperating tug of war
Across a span of diminished hope
There has to be some solace
Near the end of my rope
Nothing that I can do or say
Changes, impervious to gain
The collateral damage is done
A consequence to the pain

So many months, eaten away
The thin fabric of a ruse
Resentful of my own creation
 A moth disguised as a muse
Rose-coloured tunnel vision?
Wishful thinking all along?

For the sanity of lost time
It would help if I was wrong

Take me back to my muse
Release me from this regret
From the pall of uncertainty
That hangs over me yet
From the now back to the then
The difference of day to night
To open arms and an open mind
To a butterfly, in a better light

Selfless

       Selfless

These thoughts
were written
with both
respect and regret
about The Most
Selfless Person
that I
have ever met

I can’t imagine
a kinder man
Quiet of words
and soft of heart
A loving Father
Wonderful Grandfather
Doing far more
than just his part

His time
became your time
Always going
out of his way
Whenever anyone
needed anything
At any hour
On any day

Tireless Volunteerhockey ice
Generous and warm
Patient and calm
Unselfish and true
What seemed like
nothing to him
meant everything
to you

Always thinking
of others first
That’s just how
he chose to live
Giving everything
of himself, and more
Until he had
no more to give

Robert Joseph Leo
Friend to many
Known to most
as Bobby Breen
He was Bob, to me
And he was also 
The Most Selfless Man
that I
have ever seen

Discretion

DiscretionIMG_20141102_142927[1]

Stopped instantly in your tracks.
Waves of shock and then disbelief.

Her picture right there for all to see
The headline, as plain as can be
Words that strike at your very core
Shaken by the thought of reading more
You dare to look, despite the knowing
Helpless to keep it all from showing
Putting your back against the wall
Needing support as your barriers fall

Because now,
you are weakened by what you’ve read,
and you can’t move ahead.


Staggered by this second-hand news.

An instantaneous jolt of clarity. 

Taken directly to a time and a place

Flashing back, to that perfect face
A playful smile you will never forget
The honest heart of your last regret
An ideal situation, some would say
Judged yourself and you walked away
A circumstance you left behind
Rarely ever crossing your mind

Until now.
You are taken aback by what you’ve heard,
but you can’t say a word.


Inhibited by the same weight of discretion.

Just as private as it was back then.

Age, and then distance, were both too far
You sullenly
remove your suit from the car
Knowing what no one else needs to know
That it’s far more respectful not to go
Keeping your distance is probably best
Questions to avoid in the eyes of the rest
Despite yourself, you know what to do
Closure is for the family, not for you

For now.
 You are constrained by the reasons why,
 so you cannot say good-bye.

 

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A peculiar sensation of personal loss.
Over someone and something that you let go.

Finding yourself alone with your despair

Few who could really understand or care
Absolutely no shame in what you feel

Convenient secrets, you chose to conceal
Fleeting memories, you fought to dismiss
Coming around, when it comes to this
A conscious grip on things back then
You have to confront those choices again

But now,
you need time and space with what you know.
 Because you have to let her go…
again.

 

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