Unintended

Unintended

A reminder, that dug deep into my heart.

Seemingly unintended, yet sharply unkind.
So, I let it slide back, to that place inside.
To be stored again, on the edge of my mind.


Subtle and unintentional. Cruelly unnecessary.

A mention of things that I am well aware
Slid out to me, with an unknown intent
Such a sad reminder, so doubly unfair

I could only assume that you were unaware
So, I closed the door, and locked out the bad
Spent a moment alone, in your bathroom mirror
Emerged with a smile. And without the mad.

Yet, I can’t even fathom why you said what you said
And I am positive that you don’t even know
On any other, more certain night
My first instinct would have told me to go

But, I wouldn’t have.

This has little bearing on the respect that I have.
Typically, thoughtful, in most you say and most you do.
It’s more a self-analysis, of my coping skills.
Ninety-eight percent about me, and only a bit about you.


A reminder, that I didn’t need to hear.

About something that I can’t control.
A reality, always on the edge of my mind.
An unintended reminder of my limited role.


This is not the first time that I have felt this way

And, certainly, it will not to be the last
Such painful reminders feel doubly unfair
Unintended entendre, of both present and past

Of circumstances, that I can barely grasp
Choices, life’s evolution, and some of my fears
Set situations, that are beyond my reach
Reluctant adjustments made over the years

Yet, just as I find a semblance of acceptance
There it is, pushed out at me all over again
To be pulled back inside, in one irreverent moment
Me, not certain why. You, not knowing when.

But, how could you?

A harsh reminder, not converted into harsh words.
Despite thinking that someone else would.
Remembering, ironically, something you’d said.
About our ninety-eight percent, that is very good.


I wanted, intently, to discuss it with you then.

But it seemed somehow misplaced in the dark of your view.
So, I  kept it inside. Until I could write it, instead.
From the edge of my mind, like I always do.

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Reason

Reason
I see the lows of your residual pain,
and I feel helpless 
But I know what I need to do
I need to be the strength that pulls you up, 
and keeps you there
I want to be the man to take care of you

I want to be your resilience
I want you to move on, with me, 
to a far better place
I want to be beside you when get there
I want to be the reason for the next smile on your face

20180305_103244
I find myself, wrapped up in your worry,

holding you, firmly in my arms
And I never want to say when
I want you to always feel secure,
safe within my love
To be the certainty, to your never again

I want to be your clarity
Want you to look straight ahead,
and to never turn away
I want to be in focus, the bright future
I want to be the reason  
you look forward to every day


I am realistic, and I am a dreamer 

I know that life isn’t easy,
especially with lingering doubt
I want to help you cope, to give you hope
I want to play a part in your dreams,
and be part of what they are about

I want to be your confidence
I want you to feel good about yourself,
because so much of you is good
I want to be your daily reminder
I want to be the reason,
every reason, that you should

IMG_1520263488115
Most of all, I want to be your optimism

Want you to find the best of me,
and to discover even more in time
I want to be your inspiration
I want to be the rhyme, and the reason,
just as you are the reason to my rhyme

 

 

Hatred

                HATRED KKK-compressed
Hate came to town today,
dressed in white supremacy.
Neo-Nazi indignation.
Anti-Semitic ugliness,

masked and marching,
in a cavalcade of the obtuse.
A mounted symbol of slavery
deployed as a lightning rod.
A rusted relic, a reminder,

as a spark for uncivil unrest.
A statue of limitation,
disguised as a pointed excuse.

Steaming cauldrons
of racist contempt.1280x720_70818P00-YDNEU
Trumped-up tension,
rocking violently,
Teetering, on the thin lever
of our deepest fears.
Boiling vessels
of blood and bigotry.
Hatred and ignorance,
spilling over.
Scalding our common decency,
after simmering for eight years.

Hate came to town,
waving a confederate flag.
White bred nationalism,xzkaj8qjbnxlro9644tv-1
with automatic weapons.
Carrying the Klan torch.
Still lost in the dark.
Unwilling and unable
to see the light of today.
From candles and smart phones
to the pall of burning crosses.
Taking America back,
in Emancipation park.

Right-wing extremity,
for all the world to see.
A car, used as a weapon.
Four wheeled empowerment.

Driven by intolerance,
to the basest depths of cowardice.
A century and a half
of deep-seated contempt.
Hatred and ignorance.
A stark picture of America,
still in black and white.

Tell me, please, what year is this?

Hate came to Charlottesville,
and the president was indifferent.
Splitting thinning hairs,
divided by his loyalties.
Shrugging off responsibility,images
like a coward in the fray.
Puny, meagre condemnation,
on a historical, immoral stage.
Commander of the white alt-right,
placing blame “on many sides”,
simply walked out of the room
on this dark and dire day.

 

News

                               News

I used to read the paper every single day.
Some days now, I see it and I back away.


It’s tempting to hide during times like this
With the blind hope that ignorance is bliss
In Canada it seems easier to smell the flowers
But that stench in the world is also ours
It’s both nauseating and difficult to understand
And it tempts you to bury your head in the sand
News, however is virtually impossible to ignore
With so many reasons and sources to explore
It’s often both sickening and sensational
Equal parts excruciating, and conversational
Scorching headlines that intensify our thirst
Multimedia reminders of all of the worst
‘The War on Terror, and ‘The War on Drugs’
Suicide bombers and twice-escaping thugs
Al Qaeda, the Taliban, hate and terror schemes

Religion and the self-righteous, taken to extremes
ISIS, FARC, GMO, and the NRA
Acronyms putting people into harm’s way
Accidental shootings, mass crimes
Ignorance, intolerance, a sign of the times
Homophobic opinion, transgender debates
Unconscionable policy in certain states
Disturbing views so easily found
Cavernous cracks in moral ground
Earthquake, tsunami, a tornado’s clout
Wild fires, record heat, and devastating drought
Nature’s anomalies, a tropical storm then a flood
Knowing, and cringing, while the ozone oozes blood
A world where oil is the most powerful king
And conservation and preservation don’t mean a thing
A world of archaic ideas, and misplaced priorities
Limited choices, and laughable authorities
With the threat of ever-hovering inflation

And an idiot, vying to lead a nation

Reasons enough eh, to want to hide
To shut your door, and stay inside
Build your wall and let ignorance protect you
The election’s coming though, so you may not have to.

Fleeting

           Fleeting

It comes more with age20150827_184053[1]
Becomes more of a reality
You examine your life
Struck by your mortality

With every death
With every wake
There is another punch
You have to take

It beats me down
One reminder at a time
One more reason
For every rhyme
Again and again
It tortures my heart
If I’m going to live
I’d better start

Responsibility and life
Work and play
Flying through the motions
Of another day

It’s Monday to Sunday
In the blink of an eye
Barely getting on
As time whips by


It’s all an illusionimagesM5E0G21W
It’s a ruse, a sham
All just an act
It’s not who I am

It wears me down
One day at a time
One more reason
For every rhyme
Again and again
It tortures my heart…

Fulfillment is fleeting
You must
maintain your drive
Keep your foot on the gas
Accelerate, to feel alive

Too much pain
Too many pills
So much coffee
So many hills

The climb up 20150827_184220[1]
The slide back
The self-regulation
Is what I lack

It brings me down
One vice at a time
One more reason
For every rhyme
Again and again
It tortures my heart…

They say that a mind
Is a terrible thing to waste
And that life is bland
Unless you dare to taste

That the key to success
Is hard to locate
When opportunity knocks
Rush to the gate

But what I want
What I actually need20150827_184348[1]
Is a little more time
Is a lot less speed

Control of the pace
A slowly opened door
Because more or less
Less is more

One good reason
For every rhyme
To ease me down

One moment at a time
Again and again
To soothe my heart
If I’m going to live
I’d better start

Support


IMG_20150201_103912[1]
SUPPORT

I look to my left
and I see
Look to my right
and I see
The people I love
here beside me…

Your support is always there
More than mere words can really say
With whatever comes, whatever may
With every challenge on any day
Your support comes my way
And you are there

Your honesty opens my eyes
You tell me exactly how it is
Through distraction, I am remiss
Through times as complex as this
Support slides in with a reminder or a kiss
And you open my eyes

Your laughter brings me back
Daughters who make life fun
Despite the race, I’ll never run
Despite the clouds I see your sun
Support slides in two for one
And you bring me back

Your love holds me up
Keeps me on level ground
Whenever I’m lost, I am found
Whenever doubt comes around
Support slides in without a sound
And you hold me up

Your support is everything to me
This family is my wall
With all together, will never fall
With all for one and one for all
Your support is for the long haul
And it’s everything to me

It is unwavering
and it lights my way

With whatever comes
and whatever may

What my mere words
can barely say…


But I will always try.

Paper and pen for SURE

Good-bye

trail3

Good-bye

Time and again
I have felt it
That pang of emptiness
the weight of a sigh.
Sometimes I suppress it
sometimes I don’t
But every time…
I hate good-bye.


I could see it as

I held your hand
that knowing look
in your eyes
Even as you struggled 
you recognized
my struggle
with good-byes

Some impressions
sink in and stay
Unselfish imprints
the enduring part
Personal reminders
a life-long spirit
Eternally residing
inside your heart

I knew our bond
 would never die
 I saw it, as we said
good-bye


What we shared

was short but sweet
wrought with
what ifs and whys
I hated breaking
your honest heart
Even more than
I hate good-byes

Sometimes it is not
meant to be
Excruciating decisions
painful choices
Personal priorities
conscious realities
Mindful guidance
from internal voices

I apologized for
the reasons why
Even as we said
good-bye


You gave us twelve

memory filled years
 But moving on
and out was wise
One final time 
I closed your door
 Reminding me of why
I hate good-byes

Someone put a wedge
between us
Breaking down walls
is always tough
Family and love are
reasons for change
Love and change
were reason enough

I felt the memories
and began to cry
Pausing, as I said
good-bye


It is just a part

of who I am
It does not matter
how hard I try
The simple soul
inside of me
Simply hates to say
good-bye

We can’t hold on
to forever
Inevitable and circumstance
will come along.
That doesn’t mean
that it won’t hurt
So say good-bye…
 but stay strong.

IMG_20150112_125722[1]

INITIATIVE

                 

                 Initiativeone way

I sit alone in my wondering
and it clouds my mind

Nurture may not be your nature,
but there is something I should say.
Affection leads to affected,
when it only goes one way.

You put your gloved hand on
top of my knee
Reminding me of just how rare
that seems to be
Unknowing likely, perhaps
but noticeable to me

Alone behind a curtain of
sheer connotation
The way we should feel, belies
this sensation
Therein lies the rub, of our
unique situation

It distracts me from my ease,
as such
A simple gesture found within
a simple touch
And I don’t believe that it is really
asking
too much

I hold all of the initiative
and it bruises my heart

Nurture may not be your nature,
but there is something I should say.
Lonely leads to lonesome,
when it only goes one way.

A man should never talk about
such trivial things
The importance of touch, and all
that it brings
Or the way that the lack of it
sometimes stings

There are those who feel the same, I
would guess
It may seem absurd to others, who
need far less
But contact comforts me thoroughly, I
must confess

It does distract me from my ease,
as such
Our house is only so big, yet are insticts
seldom touch
And constantly reaching out to you, feels
like too muchimagesM5E0G21W

I grow weary of the initiative
and find myself hesitating

Nurture may not be your nature,
but there is something I should say.
Distant leads to distance,
when it only goes one way.

Companionship keeps me close, when
push comes to shove
I don’t doubt your sincerity or question

your love
And I do realize that it is your hand
inside that glove

I wish it didn’t matter to me,
but it just does.

I am preoccupied with the initiative.
Is it is just me?

 

If

                                         If 
If you fall…
I will pick you up and carry you to comfort.
Turn all of your pain into careful laughter.
Wipe away your hurt and put you at ease.
Make all the difference from before to after.
Try3

If you struggle…
I will help you to forget about your worries.
Simply listen, and make it clear that I’ve heard.
Gather up your anxiety and take it far away.
Replace your sad thoughts with just the right word.
 
If you need…
I will provide you with everything that I have to share.
Be there with you entirely, in spirit and mind.
With the whole of my heart and a hand to hold onto.
Give you all that I am, and all I can find.

If you doubt…
I will make sure that you know that all is well.
Reassure you that your hopes are never too late.
Be the epitome and embodiment of positive thought.
Show you the future, and all that can be great.

If you forget…
I will remember to tell you how respected you are.
I will remind you that I love you, each and every day.
Will always be there, to ensure that you know .
Make it forever clear with the words that I say.
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