Laps

Laps

Hearts choose

Egos bruise
Stubborn minds
light the fuse
A battle of wills
that I would win,
and I would lose
I contended
while you pretended
Yet, it was me
who had to choose

Broken flowers
Passionate showers
The uncertainty
filled my hours
Ups and downs
losing their steam,
and their odd powers
I would retreat
from your defeat
Yet, it was me
who still brought flowers

Love and pain
Loss and gain
Writing laps
around the same refrain
Weathered words
between the lines,
between the sun and rain
I could buffer
your claim to suffer
Yet, it was me
who felt the pain

Until the truck pulled up

to load up my life,
once again.

Retreat

“Is it contact or just reaction?
…Is it living, or just existence?
It takes a little more persistence
To get up and go the distance

— Neil Peart – Something For Nothing


Retreat

I contended
while you pretended
Yet, it was I
who had to choose…

Hearts choose
Egos bruise
Stubborn minds
light the fuse
A battle of wills

that I would win,
and lose


I retreated

while you depleted
Yet, it was I
who still brought flowers…

Broken flowers
Passionate showers
The uncertainty
filled my hours
Ups and downs
losing their steam,
their odd powers


I rejected
while you reflected
Yet, it was I
who felt the pain…

Too much pain
Nothing to gain
Constant inconsistency
driving me insane
The truck pulled up
to load my life,
once again.

March 26/17


“I’ve been burdened with blame,
trapped in the past for too long,

I’m moving on”

— Rascal Flatts —

Limitation

The unique thing
about regret
is that
the less you experience
the more you get        – G.G.

                                   Pic3 for Alive
Limitation

I’m taking a bit of a risk,
but what if I didn’t…

I’d rather live in the moment
than live with regret
Take a chance on what I want
and grab all I can get
No stop signs
No hesitation 
No blurred lines
No limitation
I intend to make the most
of this one-time life
Bring the best of it all
into plain sight
Exhausting each day
Exhausted each night

My motivation can be seen
in unique places
In hopeful eyes
On mourning faces
Times of celebration
Times of dread
Times to remember
Time, to look ahead

IMG_20141215_173356[1]

I’d rather look to the future
than look back with regret
Embrace all of those who inspire
and give back as I get
No retreat
No reservation
No boundaries
No limitation
I intend to stretch my mind
to greater lengths
Flights of fancy
and fanciful flights
Lifting the best of me
to loftier heights

My motivation can be found
in unique places
In beautiful smiles
On candle lit faces
People we meet
People we admire
People we love
People who inspire

pexels-photo-321444.jpeg

I’d rather embrace the possibilities
than accept the regret
Put myself completely out there
Give more than I get
No misunderstanding
No misinterpretation
No incompletes
No limitation
I intend to hold nothing back
in my quest to grow

Express my self
to all who should know
Take the best of me along
to wherever I go

Live this life for every moment
Experience more, every chance I get
Taking risks, and taking strides
Staying ahead of my regret

Solitude

          tears bench
Solitude

 I choose time alone
when I simply want to be
nearer to myself
 my solitude and me

A discreet place to revitalize my mind
Leaving the mess of the world behind
Discovery within my solitary den
Deciding where and how and when
Choosing to get lost, in order to find
A matter of self-reflection, that’s undefined
A substance of silence that finds my pen
Feelings are sought and selected again

Paper and pen for SURE
I need to escape
to where I should be
closer to myself
 my solitude and me

Sometimes separation is a necessary place
Withdrawing my emotions at my own pace
Safer within my sole situation
Restrained inside my contemplation
Choosing to retreat, to my own space
Saving my words, while saving face
Distancing myself from temptation
Separating sense from sensation

IMG_0575
I seek out true serenity
  comfort in where I will be
right there beside myself
 my solitude and me

A secluded place where my soul can stay
Understanding the world, by turning away
Immersed within my distinct seclusion
Savoring quality time without intrusion
Choosing the hours, from day to day
 To do my own thing, in my own way
Lured by a tranquility that’s paper thin
My particular private selfish place within

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I choose this time alone

so I can just be
content with myself
 my solitude, and me

This peaceful place where I have grown
Recognizing the richness of self-unknown
Perception within my mind’s eye
Seeing the strength and knowing why
Choosing to internalize, on my own
Joined by my thoughts, I am never alone
 Together we laugh, we learn, we try
Finding perspective with myself and I

 

black and white piano

Retreat

               Retreat  IMG_0575

I escape to my own space
to be alone with my despair
Four walls and my thoughts
keep me company there…
A curtain shields the light
I sit, I think, I stare.

A place where I can hide
until sense is restored
Until understanding surfaces
all else can be ignored.

Until I regain some strength
Until my nature takes its course
All else will be ignored
while I find my creative force.

I retreat to my own space
to make sense of my despair
Four walls and my emotions
keep me company there…
My mind fills the page
I sit, I feel, I repair.

Time need not heal me
I have to feel like this 
I want my sorrow to affect me
this, is just how it is.

I have to experience this suffering
I want this productive pain
This, is just how it is
From loss, to mindful gain.

I choose to heal in my own space
to gain release from my despair
Four walls and my words
keep me company there…
Shedding light on my recovery
I sit, I write, I share.