Grey


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Grey

Certainly not what I expected
when I looked anxiously to today
Distractions and detours
Delay after delay
Nothing like I had envisioned
No how.  No way.
A reluctant change of course
Navigating the grey

A wall of grey uncertainty
between you and your goal
A hard place, and a rock
w
hen you’re ready to roll
An unexpected wait
A mirage of elusive control
Asking such a small price
Just patience for your toll

Inside the grey uncertainty
t
ime stands painfully still
Between situation and explanation
Just be calm.  Just remain chill.
Between exasperation and exhaustion
Exhale, slowly, and swallow the pill
In the grey of the uncertainty
c
ome what may, inevitably will


Definitely not what I wanted
when I looked forward to tonight
Dissention and distance
Wrong versus right
Nothing like I had envisioned
On my mind. Out of sight.
The tone of grey reaction
Neither black nor white

Toiling in the grey unknown
of a lost night out
In the variable and the vague
is the unseen and the doubt
A question is the answer
When silence is a shout
Look to the big picture
Just relax, and wait it out

Inside the grey unknown
b
eing oblivious can be a roll of the dice
Between interpretation and explanation

Just be understanding. Just be nice.
Between selfish and self-preservation
Do not make the same mistake twice

In the grey of the unknown
u
npaid attention has no actual price


Trapped, within the nowhere near

of where I want my thoughts to be
Distracted and dismayed
My time feels far from free
Nothing like I had envisioned
Awaiting words. A wait and see.
The quiet of the gray
Speaks volumes to me

Staring into the grey silence
of a blank refreshed screen
Checking in after every chapter
like a procrastinating teen
Those certain expectations
The how it’s always been
Confined inside your cellular
Just swipe the slate clean

Inside that grey silence
unrealistic standards are the cage
So make the necessary adjustments
Just turn it off.  Just act your age.
Leave the drama for the characters
Leave the scenes for some stage
In the grey of the silence
you can always
turn the page


Convinced that I am ever-evolving,
I look optimistically ahead
Detraction and reaction
Saying the unsaid
As far, and as much, as I can envision
Also, and more so.  Instead of instead
Negotiating the grey
Whenever I am seeing red

Coping within the grey areas
of our everyday race
With road blocks personified
An invasion of personal space
A barrage of harsh mentality
The reality of commonplace
The simplest of solutions
Just choose dignity, and grace

In the grey of the grey areas
doom and gloom are never much fun
Between frustration and explanation
Just be positive. Be the stronger one.
Between excuses and excusing
You know what needs to be done
Even in the greyest of the grey
rose-coloured glasses will let in the sun

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Capsule

         CAPSULE

Entirely trapped within
an apprehensive maze
Rapt with guarded allure
in an enigmatic haze
Looking in the distance
a glimpse of what could be
A capsule look beyond
an instance of her with mebed - Copy

Finding in her eyes
what I was searching for      
A free-spirited soul
with so much more
An outlook so positive
a sense of good and true
Seeing an internal beauty
immersed inside my view

Everything feels so unreal…
Alone inside that moment.

Still slowly discovering
on our uncertain way
Fought against temptation
but decided to stay
Should have known better

should have said good night
Got lost in compulsion
the timing wasn’t right

Wary of that direction
so weary of that game
Thought we wanted more
thought we felt the same
A careful patient journey
had brought us to this place
Why the sudden detour?
Why this need to race?

Everything feels so unreal…
Left alone in that moment.

Saying what I thought
she wanted to hear
Candid cautious words
her silence very clear
Insights I would regret
with no need to rush
Uttered in a blind hurry
to just an eerie hush

Jolted from my trance
self-assurance suppressed
Nothing else for me to do
but quietly get dressed
Traces of good intentions
scattered carelessly around
Faint hopes lying on the floor
picked up without a sound

Everything feeling so unreal…
I left alone at that moment.

An agonizing drive home
riddled with doubt
Searching inside to findhazy woods
what that reaction was about
Harsh recurring analysis
Backtracking in my head
What made her panic?
What was it that I said?

Entirely trapped within
a confining, isolated maze
Stranded with my misgivings
in an angst-ridden haze
Lost before it was found
never knowing what could be
A fleeting capsule look
an instance of you and me

Everything feels so unreal…
All alone with that moment

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